The Mushroom Vaccine?

We all do it. We misunderstand a word or a phrase we hear in music or conversation and verbalize something amusing as a result. Recently my first grader informed me that she does not like "toxic water" but enjoys eating "octopus testicles." I was glad to have less household competition for my favorite summer refreshment (tonic water), but explaining that her recent seafood dining experience involved tentacles not testicles produced several other awkward anatomy questions.

Adults are not immune from publicly garbling unfamiliar words or phrases. I'll admit I walked around for some time talking about "lost leaders" in reference to a pricing strategy used by some big box department stores. In this strategy the company offers a ridiculously low-priced item to lure customers into the store knowing the average customer spends a substantial amount on more profitable items once there. Finally my accountant, chuckling, informed me that I probably meant to say "loss leader" unless there actually was a missing manager (a lost leader) in my scenario.

I'm sure that every professional out there--from plumber to physician--has heard some very funny alternatives to technical terms they use every day! It certainly happens in veterinary medicine, especially with vaccines.

I'd wager the oldest vaccine terminology mix-up involves "distemper." The "distemper" vaccine is given to dogs and cats to protect against a collection of viral and bacterial diseases. It is not given to improve the behavior of pets with surly or unruly temperaments! Usually when I hear this mix-up, the client has requested the "temperament" vaccine with a smile and a laugh, and I'm not sure if he is putting me on! To set the record straight, the Distemper virus in dogs can cause serious if not fatal neurological, respiratory and gastrointestinal illness. In cats, feline distemper (actually panleukopenia virus) can result in dangerously severe immune suppression. Thankfully, the vaccines available for canine and feline distemper are very safe and effective.

Another common terminology goof-up involves the Kennel Cough vaccine. One of the important causative agents of Kennel Cough is a bacteria called Bordetella bronchiseptica. (Yeah, it's a mouthful!) Each year, dogs that may come in contact with this infectious organism at kennels, dog parks or grooming facilities receive the "Bordetella" vaccine. It is understandable that some clients--who only have to think about this organism once a year when they get a reminder card from their veterinarian--remember just enough of the scientific name to request the "portabella" vaccine when making the appointment. 

Please forgive us if we smile when you accidentally say your pet needs a "mushroom" vaccine. It's a common enough mistake. We know what you mean, and we appreciate your effort to provide good veterinary care for your pet!

Rolling in Stink: A Dog's Eau de Toilette

For the past two weeks, the local farmers have been "fertilizing" their fields around our home. What that actually means is they have been spreading an intensely malodorous layer of manure over every bare patch of earth on my block. Now, I'm not the type of person who moves to the country then complains about the things that happen in the country. Still I won't miss the loud caravan of poopy trucks rumbling past the house when this task is completed. Nor will I miss the unrelenting stench or the hoards of flies.

Not everyone in the neighborhood considers the recent activity a nuisance, however. Some of my canine acquaintences, for example, find the manure quite a treat! My sister-in-law neighbor sent me a picture of her dog Ruger covered in brown stink and posed a frequently asked question: "Why do dogs roll in stink?"

I always chalked it up to an inexplicable species difference. We humans like to spritz on a little Old Spice or Chanel No. 5 before a night out. Our dogs enjoy sprucing up with a little dead skunk or cow feces. To each his own!

If you've ever watched your dog grind her shoulder into a particular spot in the grass, wriggling joyfully in aromatic unmentionables, you would think it is purely a strange preference for disgusting odors that prompts the behavior. There actually may be more to it than that. In this scenario, our dogs may be acting like their wolf ancestors!

Much of our understanding of dog behavior stems from the fact that dogs descended from wolves. While dogs and wolves are biologically very similar, dogs are not simply tame wolves. Dog behavior and wolf behavior is often drastically different.

That being said, sometimes dogs do appear to act from deeply ingrained wolfy instincts. Rolling in stink may be one such example. Biologist L. David Mech has documented a logical explanation for this apparently disgusting behavior. Mech witnessed a lone wolf eat part of a carcass then roll around in it, making herself as pungent and filthy as Ruger in the picture above. She then hiked back to her pack. Upon her return the other adult wolves sniffed her all over and easily followed the scent trail back to the meal.

Knowing that Ruger's stinky fur may be evidence of his loyalty probably does not make up for the fact that he needs another bath. But it is an interesting explanation for a common problem. Dogs have done an amazing job of fitting into our homes and hearts, but sometimes we forget they are still animals with animal instincts. To us a decomposing rabbit is an icky mess in the backyard. To your scavenging dog, it is a suitable and--(lucky you) sharable--meal. Why dogs might consider cow poop a treasure worth eating or sharing, however, is a topic for another time!

Stranger on the Farm

Stranger on the farm

The other evening I stepped outside the house in time to see a bizarre animal trotting through the farmyard. It looked like a wild cat but was much taller and lankier. It was awfully shabby looking and had a small white tuft on the end of its tail. My yellow lab EdGrrr caught sight of it too, and gave chase just as the visual puzzle pieces clinked into place in my mind. Although for a split second I wondered if I might be witnessing a Wisconsin chupacabra, I quickly realized it was a terribly mangy fox!

EdGrrr dutifully obeyed my hollers to leave off the sick creature. In spite of being fully vaccinated, I didn't want him tangling with a diseased fox. Then I began to worry. What is this fox doing wandering through a heavily trafficked farmyard at dusk? Is it living in one of the outbuildings? Will it harm my cats or dogs? What if my kids come upon it suddenly as they play? Foxes are known to carry rabies, and I was taught to suspect rabies in any wild animal that acts out of the norm like this.

When asked to "get him up,"  EdGrrr immediately traced the fox to our dairy barn. From an unseen hiding place, the crazy fox started hoarsely barking. This too concerned me. Why would such a reputedly sly creature give away his position? At my urging, my husband readied his shotgun and we began to search in earnest for the miserable creature. Our neighbor, whose chickens had been repeatedly marauded by a hairless fox, gladly answered my call for assistance with the hunt. It didn't take long for him to locate the fox and put him out of his misery.

I know from my experiences with dogs that sarcoptic mange is miserable. The insect parasite makes animals insanely itchy. They scratch at themselves so much they get secondary bacterial skin infections which can lead to serious systemic illness. Upon inspection, this poor fox was nearly hairless. His face was such a mass of scabs it looked like tumors covering his head. Gaunt and bony, the pathetic animal had been stealing chickens in broad daylight. Whether his boldness was due to rabies, starvation or desperation, this fox needed to be eliminated. Doing so performed a duty to the neighborhood animals (wild and domestic), protected my little farm family, and permanently alleviated the fox's suffering.

The "Circle of Life" is not just a Disney anthem. Death is a reality, but it need not be viewed as harsh. Sometimes it is an expedience to maintaining "herd health." Sometimes it is a great kindness.

Driving me batty

My husband hurried into the house the other night slightly breathless. He had been outside closing up one of the outbuildings when a bat breezed in and out of the shed inches above his head. The stuff of vampire lore and Hollywood hype, bats have been giving humans the heebie geebies for millenia. Unfortunately, in recent years bats have also been giving humans the deadly rabies virus.

Bats are actually wonderful creatures. A small bat can capture more than 1,200 mosquitoes in a single hour! They are also sensitive to environmental changes and may act as a "canary in a coal mine" for ecologists. Cave bats (the type that like to roost in attics) are currently threatened by a strange fungal disease called white-nose syndrome. In 2010 they were extended protection from extermination under Wisconsin law.

Despite their virtues, I get a little freaked out about bats. Last spring my newly remodeled old farmhouse was haunted by a bat for several weeks. It tended to show up in the family room while the television was on. Once, while I was tracking it through the house in an effort to shoo it outside, it made a pit stop in a ceiling light fixture. Crouching on the floor and wearing a winter stocking cap (yes, I looked ridiculous), I gazed up in horror as the tiny winged mammal peered over the edge of the shade at me! Its beady eyes, pointy ears and toothy muzzle are imprinted in my memory. Before I could gather my wits it was off again, fluttering finally into an unfinished bedroom amidst construction materials. This scenario repeated over several evenings before I managed to open the front door during one of its sweeps through the living room. Although I never actually saw it leave, that was the last night it appeared.

Later that same summer my sister-in-law was similarly bedeviled by a trespassing bat. On several occasions she found herself trapped under her bed covers miserably text messaging me about her intruder. Finally, her fearless feline Izzie trapped the bat in the bathroom and that was the end of our bat saga. Or nearly so. Because bat droppings were discovered on the bedside table, my sister-in-law's family doctor recommended rabies prophylaxis. This is the series of injections given to prevent the development of rabies in people exposed to potentially rabid animals. If we had kept and killed the bat, we could have sent it in to the Wisconsin Veterinary Diagnostic Laboratory for testing to determine if rabies prophylaxis was necessary. Better safe than sorry. (The CDC provides good guidelines for whom should receive rabies prophylaxis.)

The first case of a successful rabies prophylaxis was in 1885. Louis Pasteur injected a child with recently invented rabies vaccine soon after the boy was mauled by a rabid dog. Amazingly, the child survived! Once signs of rabies appear the disease is always fatal.*

Bats have only recently been cited as a reservoir for rabies virus. Until the late 1980s, dogs were a major source of rabies in the U.S. Widespread mandatory vaccination programs have significantly decreased dog rabidity. Most human cases of rabies exposure in the U.S. are now linked to wildlife such as skunks and bats. Worldwide, however, dogs are linked to nearly 55,000 human rabies deaths a year. Efforts like World Rabies Day are underway to vaccinate as many canines as possible to reduce the incidence of human rabies.

Cat catches bat

Rules regarding rabies vaccination of cats varies by municipality. Many people feel their indoor cats do not need rabies vaccination. However, because you never know when your home might be visited by a bat intruder, and because indoor kitties like Izzie are ever so helpful in containing potentially rabid bats in the home, I strongly recommend vaccinating all feline friends--indoors or out. Rabies vaccination in pets is safe and inexpensive while the disease and prophylaxis in humans is certainly not!


* The miraculous recovery of the Fond du Lac teenager afflicted with rabies in 2004 should not give us a false sense of security. The therapy used in her case, the Milwaukee Protocol, has been used successfully in only two other cases of human rabies.